Well, today was a fun day at the track. Talon's time was close to mine. That being said, there were problems galore at the track. When I got there (about 10 minutes early to scout out the cars. Well, everybody was slip sliding everywhere on the track. Hmm these cars must be really fast, or these drivers are horrible. We get in and find out that they put some powder on the track to soak up some gas/oil residue that was building up. Woohoo, just what I need, rally style racing!

I look at the previous fastest lap, it was in the mid 43's. Damm that's slow, I think to myself, even if I take it easy, I can beat 43 seconds! Well as the group in front was racing, they managed to lower the fastest lap to 41 seconds. Well, that's beatable, and as the powder spreads, lap times will increase (just like racing on a street course. Well, times sure did fall. Some guy pulled of an incredible 15.54 second lap! Damm he's quick. Actually not, there was a computer problem of some sort.

Well, it's time for Talon and I to race! I get my car going, and the engine starts choking on me. Ahh fuck, don't even say I'm outta gas. Well I wasn't. A lap later and the engine was performing flawlessly. I get a through a few turns and realize this car is loose. I'm talking no back tires loose, the thing would wiggle every turn. I hit the wall at least once a lap just to straighten the damm thing out. Then came the first of two big incidents. Heading into the first of the hairpins, some guy spins out in front of me. Now with my tyres (British Style spelling) covered with that nice white powder (that almost looked like Tha Preacher had lost a weeks supply of blow) my braking wasn't the best. BOOM, I hit the guy in the green car. No biggy, I can still turn my car around and drive away (he was pointed at the wall, while I had enough room to move around him). I step on the gas....nothing. I try again....nothing. DOH I stalled my engine.

Well, 45 seconds later (and one pass by Talon) I get restarted and I'm off racing once again. Lap 14 a guy spins out in the second hairpin. This turn had a ton of white powder in the entrance to it, so if you didn't break early, you were hitting the wall, because there is no way that car is going to turn on the powder. Well, he was stuck in the wall pretty good. And his engine had died. It took the two guys supervising the track to get himn out. I only paid for 15 laps, but with nobody to flag me in, I couldn't be expected to know my time was up (well, Talon was already off the track, but a free lap is a free lap so WTF?) I sneak in 5 extra laps on the course. I felt as if I was going faster with each lap, but because my 15 were already up on the computer, I wasn't being timed. Ahh well. By the time I got off, I was tired, and my right ankle was sore (the soreness only lasted for 10 minutes)

So here are my lap times on a slippery track:

Lap Time
--------------------
08 39.00
15 39.18
07 39.27
09 39.63
06 39.68
Total Laps: 15
Average Time: 42.29

It's race night (again...he I need practice don't I???) Anyways, 8:30pm tonight at Formula Kartways, Stu, TalonBoy and Xott are going to be flying around the track once again in a never ending attempt to go faster than the previous lap. I'm boldly predicting a 35 second lap for myself today. I've had enough practice and I think I'm up to the task. How fast can I go? Stay tuned...

Primetime pointed this out to me, and I'm spreading it to you guys. For everybody that likes looking at lesbian's kissing go here. It's a great view that never ends!

People keep wanting to know what I look like, so here is a picture of me holding a digital camera.

MIIKE wants a shout out. I recommend you look at him proudly displaying his latest invention. SO TO HIM I SAY HERE IS YOUR FREAKING SHOUT OUT. YOU HAPPY NOW?????

It's Sunday and I'm at work, so immediately you know my day sucks. Well, not quite. We moved out of the computer lab in B123 to the ITSC room in B195. What this means essentially is I'm no longer stuck in a computer lab. It can be both good and bad. In the summer, I have an excellent view of the girls smoking and waiting for the bus. However, no more girls will be comming into my room to do their work. And the girls that do come in, will be ones with serious (computer) issues. RIGHT NOW, THIS ROOM IS FUCKING HOT.

Well, instead of doing real work, I decided to look for something useful. For those of us that use MSN Messenger and had that stupid invalid name thingy when we tried to change our name to something funny, you can download MSN Anyname. You also might need MSWINSCK.OCX to run it. Just scroll down the page and get it. There's some directions to follow.

Well, I'm out for now, later.

If you haven't already, check out the excellent webdesign on EnSabac's website. He did a good job remodeling it. In other news, Boost Monkey seems to be out of a Talon for a bit. It's a sad story if you want to read it here . Now who's making fun of that Corolla? Slow and steady wins the race :p

I went to Lousiana Seafood and Crab House today. Damm, they got some nice Italian 18 year old waitresses (always a good way to extract a tip from me). Saw Austin Powers last night...I haven't been to a sell out theatre in a long time. 450 people were there to see the 9:55 show at AMC Courtney Park. Good movie, I'll rant about it tommrow.

Regardless of what's said on this site I had a slow car. You'll be able to compare my lap times with previous ones and I'll be able to prove to you how slow my car actually was.

36.74
37.04
37.08
37.10
37.16

I was consistently slow. Next week, I'll be faster, I gaurantee.

Well, GoldMember comes out today, I had a good rant ready to post, except I closed the browser window by accident so there'll be none of it today. Well here is the jist of it, my definitions for groups of guys walking down the street

1 person: loner
2 people: pair of homo's
3 people: trio
4 people: posse
5 people: clique
6 people: gang
7 or more people: A bunch of immigrants because odds are more than half were not born in this coutnry.

Oh here comes the rant of a lifetime.
Speaking previously about my boss and how I despise him in every way possible. Well todays episode pushed me over the edge! I call in work to inform him that I wont be coming in today, and what does mister circle jerk have to say about that? Hmmm?

Flamming Homo: Sid I dont think this arrangement is going to work out. I dont think you have what it takes to be a part of the "team"
(I begin to think hes insinuating that I am gay)
Sid: Well what do you mean?
Flamming Homo: I think its better if you didnt come into work anymore.

This is where I begin to get angry, I tell him where he can shove his fugging job! Now ol Siddy is once again jobless and living on nothing. This day has one shining moment. Its almost over.
I think the worse type of person is a power tripping homo.

-Sid

Morning all...whoever invented getting up early for anything deserves to be shot. I don't really have anything else to say other than the only reason I am still awake is because I'm going to Hooters in an hour. Ahh hooters, the one place where you actually want you waitress to talk to you and you don't mind staying around for a while and enjoying the view. I gotta remember to set off the sprinkler next time I go there...that'll be good for a quick laugh (and great chance for a photo-op). Well, normally this is where I rant, but I'm all out of ranting ideas for one day. :'(

Today was going be different for me, I finnaly decided to get off my ass and replace the deodurant that I've been running out of (I have an emergency supply of degree, but that stuff just forms clumps in the rainforest that is my armpit). Well, buy some deodurant, contact lens solution (my eye was swollen all last week, so I threw out my old contact lens (yay for disposable lenses) and I'm changing my solution. I also bought some listerine because there is a nasty roomer going around that my breath stinks (honestly, I don't know why).

Well, I buy my deodurant take a look at 16 year old cashier (mmm underage girls) get my ass home, inspect the goods that I purchased (although I have no intention of using any of them) and guess what? The fuckin deodurant is ruined. The stupid thing won't twist up, and the upper part of the conatiner seems to be broken. So I say fuck, I'm out a whole $3.99!!!!!! Why the fuck can't stores inspect the goods they sell before idiots like me pick them up and bring them directly to cash? Is that too much to ask for? When I worked for LCBO, every bottle that I put on the shelves did not leak and had no manufacturing defects. Why does shoppers drug mart have to difficult? Well, tommrow afternoon (when all the full timers are working not the evening part timers) I'm going to march in there and demand an exchange. I better get it, or else shoppers drug mart is on the offical boycott list.

Boycott list and reason in bracets

McDonalds (Rumored kangaroo meat inside burgers....horrible for digestive system)
Toronto Maple Leafs Hockey (horrible team, lose 6-0 in the only playoff game I ever go to)
Famous Players Theatres (do not charge student prices)
Applebees (took 3 hours to get a meal and get out)
Fat Phils (horrible digestive problems although company has gone out of business)
Roy Rogers (the absolute worst burgers known to man)
Any Major League Baseball team (do I need to put a reason)
The Parlour Cafe (HairyGreek used to work there...nuff said)

Well here I am again for todays (re: first post was made early this morning) ranting of a lifetime.

Why do people insist on being assholes on the internet? I have met many a person online and frankly I have been seeing an over abundance of fresh faces that just make me cringe with their attitude. Definetly one prime example is in Counter-Strike. (If you dont know what this is please stop reading) Today I met yet another new person online, I was extremely nice and helpful to him in all aspects. Then he challenges me to a 2v2 on Aztec. Now since I know hes a semi-n00b I decline the offer, cause lets face it folks, I would have owned his ass. So little Mr. 14 year old starts talking shit to me. I decide Im not taking shit from a kid that wasnt even born when I was in Elementry School. So I tells the kid: Take it easy Bucko, Im just saying that I dont feel up to owning you today. *insert 14 year slanderous remarks*

-!b *14 year-olds Parents PC*

So let us reflect on these actions folks. I help and give my time to this little insect, then he decides to sting me. Am I at fault? Is todays Rap influence taking its toll on our spawn? Have they eaten their breakfast?

Now on a lighter note, I have been glued to my computer playing Counter Strike and Editing Pictures for websites. Heres a little sample of something I whipped up!

Here

And In response to Stu's post : Fat people are taking over the world! Hide your COOKIES!!!!!!

-Sid

First off let me welcome my newest ranter, SICSID to Stu's Life.

Everybody say hi to SicSid.

Now that internal business is over let me describe my experience at the argo's game today. The Pizza Pizza Party Party zone is one of the best idea's since the cheerleader. Basically it's an all you can eat pizza buffet. Only catch is you can only get one slice at a time, and lineups are usually 10 minutes in the first quater, 5 in the second, 2 in the third and non-existent in the 4th quater. Well the pizza there is filling because 3 slices was enough for me (and I still feel it in my stomach) but I won't complain, $22, pizza, a free VHS version of Austin Powers (the first one) and a football game isn't a bad deal no matter how you put it.


-- ENTERS RANT MODE --
What the fuck is wrong with the argos? Down 17 points and they are still running the ball? Who the hell is the offensive co-ordinator because I can do a much better job than him. 2nd and 17 and he fucking runs the ball. Now Micheal Bishop is a rookie QB and the playbook is limited, but come on use that fucking head of yours. Bishop has excellent mobility and can throw on the run fairly well. Why not let him run some bootlegs?

There's a lot of fat people at the Argo's game. What is it with fat people now days? They are everywhere, and they bring their children with them. You know, if I was fat and I had a child, I'd make sure my child gets plenty of exersice and thusly never develops a chance to get fat. But alas I have no children (it's the worlds loss I guess, but hey, any single non-fat ladies out there wanna have my baby send a picture (nudity preferred) to stugautz@rogers.com Only attractive girls will be considered. Fat chicks need not apply.

I've been very hard on fat people this week, but somebody needs to, the media doesn't seem to be hard on anybody these days, unless you have a religous affiliation, then you got a problem. But why is that? People with religous beliefs are looked down upon, unless your beliefes are in the minority, in which case it's ok. This is a perfect seguay for my thoughts on World Youth Day, which is being held in Toronto this year.

WHERE DID ALL THESE GIRLS COME FROM??? I actually wanna spend time downtown (another day I'll post why I don't go downtown that much but basically I hate not being able to park for free) now and try to hit on some unsuspecting world youth day girls. Some of them aren't half bad looking either. Of course you'll see the horrid ones everywhere, but hey, I'll take the good with the bad I guess. I always love to see Latin Girls up close, ever since my trip to Cancun, my view has changed on Mexican Girls.

Before Cancun, the only Mexican girls I've seen were those fat ones on tv, and the odd Mexican girl from such great movies as Born in East LA. Basically, Mexican Girls are cool because I don't see too many of them up here.

Well, that's enough rambling for one day. Detroit Lions training camp starts on Friday. GO LIONS!!!

Well Well Well.

As you can see Ol' Siddy has joined the ranks of mindless rants and the crusade to destroy rational thinking. (Wait a minute, thats the Communist Party's slogan isn't it?) Yes the Rumors are true. I have been sleeping with Stu's mom to get this valued position. But frankly it was worth it!

Now to those who dont know me: I am Sid, Destroyer of Young Virginity, Valiant Homewrecker, and Overall nice guy!

And to those who know me: You know Im a pathalogical liar!

Now let me begin my first rant...

Whats up with Bosses? I mean seriously, do they take up a nazi training course so they can become certified assholes? My boss has to be the worst one of the whole bunch. This man (if you can call him that, more on that later) makes my skin crawl in all aspects possible. He doesnt trust the people he hires, he is rude as hell to customers and he is just a plain fairy. Oh ya and hes a flaming homosexual. He basically displays his gayness 24/7. Frankly I have nothing wrong with gay people, but annoying gay people, *phew* thats a whole different story. To clear things up, this guy was a homo from the day he was concieved. His parents run a figure skating store. They named him Jasmin. Im just glad he doesnt hit on me.

The other day another flamer came in with a pair of Rollerskates. (Yes you heard me, Rollerskates) These skates are meant for a 120lbs girl and not the 200+lbs fudge packer that brought them in. As I am repairing this mans horribly overused and frankly scary skates, Jasmin comes down and tells me that homos like the customer turn him on. This is a bit of info I did not need to KNOW!

Well let me go on to something else. (if i continue this subject I fear for my mind.) Some of you may know a certain young lad named Bill (Billbert). His birthday is coming up on Friday and I dont care what you do, Spam his ass with Happy Birthday messages!

Go forth my faithful minions and produce useless bits of information!

Well Im going to let Stu post some stuff so I can humbly make fun of his sorry ass. This is Sid signing off from his first rant.

-SicSid

I had an amazying response to yesterday's rant. Who knew that something I whipped together in 5 minutes could be enjoyed by so many people? Well, Sic Sid want's a shout out in one of my next posts, but I'm debating whether or not I should put his name in.

What the fuck

SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID
SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID SIC SID

There ya go now, he should be pleasantly suprised when he reads this. ThaPreacher also liked my post, but he didn't want his name mention, so I won't mention that ThaPreacher likes peaches.

Well, class today had to be pointless. Woke up at 8 to learn about recursion. But unlike 95% of the class, I knew what recursion was before I went in the room (it's calling a method within the method body). So that was a waste of 1 1/2 hours. For the last hour and a half I tried (unsuccessfully) to get mySQL installed on Snoop Robb (aka Fat Chick Thrilla) machine. Fuck, why does Linux have to be so gay when I'm installing mySQL? Can't it just install and run? NO it has to be a whining little bitch about it and not run at all! Just like a spoiled fem-nazi.

And why the fuck does that security gaurd have to stop me every morning before I park my car. I drive the same fucking car, with the same fucking license plate and the same fucking parking pass for 2 months, I even wave at the fucker so he'll remember me and he still acts like he doesn't know who the hell I am. Well fuck you, I'm not waving at you anymore.

And why do I have to say hi to people when I pass them in the halls? I know who you are, I don't want to talk to you, so just let me continue on my way and that'll be that. Fuck talking. And why do I have to small talk with people I don't like. Don't they know these things??? Of course when they need something from me, all of a sudden they are my best friend. WELL FUCK YOU if you come from out of the blue to ask me to do something for you because I'm not going to do it.

AND WHY THE FUCK DO CLASSES START AT 8am??? Who is the genius that thought of this? I thought we live in a progressive society. If I fail my courses it's because I have ADT, but I'm fucked if I want an extra hour of sleep before work/school. Because all life will end if I don't start at 8am (regardless of the fact that nobody does any actual work for their first hour BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO FREAKIN TIRED). So let me get this straight, it's legal for two faggots to marry, but don't you dare think of starting at 10am because that's too late. TOO LATE FOR WHAT?

Fuck what's the point of starting at 8 if by the time I get home all I do is sleep for an extra couple of hours. I'd rather sleep more in the mornings and forget about my afternoon nap than be forced to wake up early. I know I'm beating this more than a mormon beats his dick Sunday afternoons, but you guys gotta agree with me here.

Woohoo, American Gladiators is on right now and the Argo game starts in 2 and 1/2 hours. I got tickets to the pizza pizza section. LATER

Another day, another rant. Well, since I have noting important to say, I'll start ranting on why I hate work (because unless you are a porn star, you aren't allowed to like work)and see where that takes me.

Fucking work makes me stay until 11 pm Monday night, with idiots who don't want to leave the damn lab. All some of these losers do is look up gay porn, talk to 18 year old virgins (who they think are female but are really male) and act smelly because heaven forbid any of them actually take a shower before comming to the lab. And when a good looking girl actually does come in (which thankfully isn't a rare site here) I always get some uber jealous fat chick talk to me and tell me she has a problem. OF COURSE YOU GOT A FUCKING PROBLEM, YOUR FAT.

And why the fuck do people even feel sorry for fat chicks? Boo hoo, you are too lazy to get off your ass and work out. WELL FUCK YOU THEN. Some of us people work hard to stay in shape and we don't want to hear your pitty stories about your problems being linked to genetics. Because it's not, it's YOUR FUCKING LAZINESS.

Spend a few hours outside in the boiling heat with the humidity that'll stick your ass to any normal patio chair and you'll sweat off 10 pounds within an hour. The secret is to NOT stuff you fat face when you get back inside.

And why is it, when I finnaly get some heat to lie down on my lawn chair and enjoy with weather with a newspaper in one hand and a beer in the other that it has to rain???? Can't the rain hold off for another hour? I was only trying to get some relaxation in before I go to work and this is the thanks I get? And if it wasn't the rain, it was the thunder tauting me before the rain came out. Mixed in with all the thunder was air planes flying over head making the exact same fucking noise as thunder. WHEN WILL IT ALL END???

Ahh well, why should I complain??? I mean, I am at work getting paid for writing these pointless rants that make me sound angry. Ahh fuck it,.

I said I was going to post yesterday's lap times and here they are:

Car #10

Lap Time
-------------------
08 35.43
11 35.53
04 35.62
14 35.73
06 35.77

Average Lap time: 38.35


My average was high due to me spinning out twice. The first spin can be attributed to Dark Pheonix and his cutting me off. The second spin was caused by me backing off on the gas and just being a plain idiot. We raced 20 laps, and I'm a little disappointed I didn't go faster than what was posted. I though for sure I would be some where in the high 34's yesterday. Ahh well, next Friday I'll be faster for sure.

Went to Formula Kartways (again) today during my lunch break. Here are Dark Pheonix's times.

Car #4

Lap Time
19 36.51
18 36.62
16 36.77
14 36.79
04 36.83

Average Time: 37.20

I'll post mine in the next update when I ge ta chance.

It's Friday night, 10:30 and TalonBoy shows up at my house. We are ready to go play some pool (shoot some stick for the Gino's out there). Well he comes up to my front door and says "Stu I think I got a flat."

So I reach into my laundry room to get my trusty flashlight and take a closer look. For those of you that are utterly clueless (read EnSabac) TalonBoy drives a 95 Eagle Talon (you see how he got the name). Anyways I look at the tire, and the outer wall on the front drivers side seems to be worn tottaly out. Damm, time for some new tires (tyres if you are reading this from England). I reccomend some Potenza's. Back to the car. So we get his Talon into my garage and get to work on changing the tire. Time is now 10:35 and I'm predicitng we can be downtown by 11:30.

Well, we pop the trunk open, get out the spare tire (which is tiny compared to the regular tires) and then try to get out the jack. I swear, that jack must have been welded in because it was next to impossible to get out. Fuck it, we'll pull out the jack from everybodies favorite chick mobile, my 96 Corolla.

Well we get the jack out of the Corolla no problem (because everybody know's Toyota doesn't weld their jacks down unlike Mitsubishi/Eagle/Chrysler/whatever you want to classify the Talon as being). We start jacking up the car and then BOOM it falls down. My brother who was supervising this whole thing starts yelling at me like I am an idiot (which I rightly deserved).

The Toyota jack didn't have a flat part at the top, so essentially the car was balancing on a toothpick. Well, my brother decides to pull out his jack (that's jack #3 for those keeping score at home).

Only problem with this jack was it took us 10 fucking minutes to get it out of the Prelude (no for those that know the RX7 story you can not know the VIN, where I live, where my brother works or what times the car is at certain places).

So it's now 11pm, and we are just about to start jacking up (not off) the car. Well, my brother seats the jack so deep under the body (because Talon's can't be serviced like normal cars they have to be difficult) that it takes us 15 minutes to get the car high enough to take the wheel off. Getting the wheel off was actually easy compared to everything else and putting on the midget sized spare tire was easy too. Getting the car down took a couple of mintues (no real hassle).

So when all was said and done, it's 11:30, my hands were a nice black from all that loose break dust but the tire was replaced and we could go out.

I told you I would post a full story about the rest of the happenings on the track, but I'm too lazy to do it. Maybe tommrow. Nothing important happend that wasn't in last nights post, so don't worry too much about it. In other news, we had BBQ today. In fact every Friday I get together with a few of my brother's friends to have some BBQ. It's a tradition that's been going on for well over two years now. We've BBQed in temperatures over 30 celcius and in extreme cold of -20 while snow was falling around us. Yes we've done it year round. Not rain, nor snow, nor hail (actually we haven't had hail here during a BBQ but I don't see why that would stop us if we did) will stop a BBQ. If you want some tips on how to marinate a steak I reccomend salt, cayanne pepper, pepprika, tyme, garlic, oregano, olive oil and some sort of alcohol (I like a shot of scotch) and let the steak stay in the marinate overnight. The next day even the toughest steak will be nice and tender. Don't worry, you won't be able to taste the alcohol at all as the spices will all overpower it.


Dark Pheonix sent me in his lap times from yesterday. Here they are: His hot lap was better than my hot lap my first time out, so I guess he is also ahead of me in his racing development program. He'll be comming out tommrow morning during my lunch break for some more racing action. What's your excuse?

Car #6

Lap Time
14 37.49
08 37.78
13 38.09
15 38.84
12 39.84

Average Lap Time: 42.02

Just got back from Formula Kartways. Had a good time there and was pleasantly suprised with my lap times. Just a few comments, tommmrow I'll have a full rant on the experience.

1. I set a new personal best @ 35.75.
2. Asian women should be banned from all karting activities (no offence to any of them, it's just there was one female who was really slow).
3. The only thing dirtier than a German is a Croat.

Ahh well, I'll stop the suspense and post my lap times along with TalonBoy's times. HairyGreek, Dark Pheonix, and UltraCaker (who may also be called Hobie once in a while) did not give me their lap times, but I may get them back in an email very soon and be able to post it up to my site as well as a mySQL database I created.

Car #7 (StuGautz)

Lap Time
------------------------
09 35.75
15 36.08
03 36.26
11 36.55
01 36.94

Average Lap Time: 38.89

As you can see, I shattered my old personal best of 38.68. In fact my average lap time was just 0.21 slower than my previous personal best.

Car #5 (TalonBoy)

Lap Time
------------------------
14 36.71
09 36.83
08 36.91
15 37.03
13 37.07

Average Lap time 40.07

This being TalonBoy's first time out, he is ahead of me after my first race. However, these faster lap times may also be due to the fact that these engines were warmed up when we got in, while my first time out we were racing on cold engines. Whatever way you look at it, we all have reason to celebrate for these lap times. Suddenly, 33.02 doesn't look unbeatable as I had very few clear laps. If I can get together a string of clear laps and avoid rubbing against the wall, I think I can beat that 33.02 time. I still have 2.73 seconds to make up, but who knows what practice will do to a person?

Also of note is UltraCaker's best lap time was 35.82 which was just a hair slower than mine. He passed me twice on the track. I sense a huge rivalry brewing between the two of us.

Guess what race fans, HairyGreek and UltraCaker have joined tonights festivities. That leaves the current entries at 5. As a general background, HairyGreek is a descent racer, and he did beat me (albeit with a more powerful car that both he and I agreed on) at Centenial Park on Sunday. Nevertheless a defeat is a defeat and I'm not here to make excuses for my past performance. Tonight will be different for sure.

UltraCaker is a man who was exiled to England for the last month. I've only seen him race once and that was on Go-Karts somewhere between Detroit and Toronto (we believe the track was located in London Ontario, but we aren't sure). That one race he fought hard, but was defeated by my superior driving. Well, maybe now is a good time to write a quick paragraph about that race. Another day I'll tell the whole story of the Detroit Lions road trip.

Anywho, I remember these cars being slow, but equal. I also remember driving this car particularly hard just for the hell of it. I was turning the wheel sharply each turn. So sharp was I turning the wheel that the engine was working harder than it ever did before. Another observation I noticed was when I turned the wheel, the car would slow down. I suspect a braking device was tied into the steering coloum that somehow cut power to the engine. Well, more than once, I turned the wheel so quickly that a black puff of smoke came out of the engine. Don't ask me how or why because it tottaly defied logic. Just the look on the mechanics face when he saw that puff of smoke was priceless. For those that know a priceless look, it was similar to me driving on a roundabout and having some moron driving a trecel go the wrong way in the roundabout in front of Sheridan College. But I won't mention anynames.

So that's the quick story and yet more race hype. It's going to be a great race and may the best man (read ME) win.

Well well well, I get an ICQ message from Dark Pheonix. Evidently he was intruiged by my go-karting exploits and things he stands a chance at challenging the currently undefeated champ. Well, not one to back down, I accepted Dark Pheonix's challenge and tonight at 8:30pm we'll have a huge race. In fact this race is so huge that TalonBoy wants to be involved with it. So I told TalonBoy to bring it on.

That leaves me with 2 competitors, 1 race and unlimited bragging rights to the winner. The loser will get nothing but verbal abuse and the shame of knowing they were defeated. I'm pumped up for the race tonight. I'll be at a small disadvantage because I can not wear my contact lenses (my eyelid was sore all week so my contact's are going in). I'll be wearing my glasses (which I also wore when I taught the professor how to drive). I guess wearing my glasses adds a bit of protection from flying particles that I would not necessarily get if I had my contacts in. Although the aerodynamic drag will slow me down.

Mentally I am prepared to win. I have been visualizing the race for the last few days. I know my strategy to victory (sorry, I'm not telling you it because my competitors may be reading). In fact anything less than a victory will be considered a disapointment. However, there are no scenarios for anything but a victory, because defeat is not an option. I will win tonight and not only will I win, I'll also make an embrassement of TalonBoy and DarkPheonix. Bottom line is I am the best, I know it, the professor know's it, my two opponents will soon find out about it and one day the whole world will know it.

DarkPheonix did beat me once in Gran Turismo 3, but that's just a video game, when I get on the road and feel that wheel in my hand it's a whole new ballgame. So to all those outthere in Stu-land that want to see me win, you are all invited to the victory parade tommrow (it's BYOB and BSSB - Bring Stu Some Booze).

After I defeat DarkPheonix and TalonBoy, I have a rematch with the Professor Saturday at 12pm (first riders on the course). This is a tune up to the big race next Friday July 26, 2002. 5pm Boost Monkey, StuGautz (me) and The Professor will have a race to end all races. Who will win?? Boost Monkey claims he's fast but anybody can talk a fast race when they are off the track. Once we get on, all bets are out the window. There's no trash talking while you are racing. We'll see who the fastest man is (ok we'll just confirm it's me but I gotta give my opponents some false hope) then we head to Hooters for the victory celebration.

In fact, I am so sure I will win Next Friday that I'm willing to bet my part of the hooters tab. So to The Professor and Boost Monkey, if you are out there reading this (which I know you are, but I don't know if you managed to get this far down the post before you got fed up with all my trash talking) are you guys up for the bet? Winner doesn't pay for their meal?

Until later tonight (when I come to gloat my vicotry) later all!

After much detective work (and with the help of G-Town Thug) I have found an image of the typical person who wants more porn on my site. As you can see, it's plainly obvious who it is. So to that person, go get a room so you and your dog can have some fun.

I had a request from somebody at Condomless Brothel for more porn. Well, this isn't a porn posting, but I did manage to find a picture of your girlfriend. And I got a picture of her friends because I know you love them all. I got more links and I'll probably post them later. Right now I'm in a statistics class and it sucks. So I'll probably have another update very shortly. Stay Tuned.

OMFG, I almost forgot to post a happy birthday wish to my favorite athlete of all time (no, it's not rackbee) Barry Sanders. Barry if you are out there reading this blog (it's highly unlikely but hey, it's worth a shot) HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAN and come back to the Lions very soon, that West Coast Offence would suit you perfectly. If anybody reading this blog knows Barry, send him my wishes and make sure he comes back real soon. We Miss Him.

And yes, I do realize there's a better chance of Britney Spears comming to meet me at school and promptly get on her knees so she know's who she's a slave for, but WTF that's why I have a webpage.

You gotta check this out, we make fun for American's making fun of our anthem, yet it's even better when they make fun of their own anthem. As that link demonstrates. However, what's more of note is some of these people, actually think they are doing a good job of it. But when it comes to kids singing anthems, I don't think it should be allowed. Nine times out of ten there is a demanding parent (see Kathy Lee Gifford who doesn't know the difference between an adult and a child when it comes to working). Some people just don't know when to quit I guess.

I had a complaint from an unknown person who claimed that my rants were too long. WELL SCREW YOU THEN!!!!!! It's my website, I rant as long as I want on this page because it's MY PAGE. That's why I've been banned from more fourms than Shelia Copps. People care what I have to say (as witnessed by the 10 hits I had yesterday, 9 from my mother alone :D) So to that person who said my rants are too long FUCK YOU TALONBOY

I went to La Poloma last night after hearing about it for 2 years from Hairy Greek. He went on raving that the ice cream was so great and this and that. Well, I didn't believe it would be that good. But the Greek man was right. Their ice cream is fucking amazying. I had the Donetella flavour. It's main flavouring ingredient is Nutella and it blew me away with it's quality. I'm definetly going back next time I'm near St.Clair and Landsdowne.

Congrats go out to Patrick Carpantier for his win in Cleveland yesterday. It was a great day for all 3 Canadien's as Paul Tracy finished 3rd and Alex Tagliani finished 5th. For those of you that don't know, the Cleveland Grand Prix takes place on an airport runway. It's one of the best races to see for the sheer fact that turn #1 always has something going on. This track is 90 feet wide at it's widest point. Car's can easily go 7 wide at the begining of the race. The advantage of having such a wide track is it's safe and yellow flags are kept to a minimum (because drivers are rarely put in a dangerous position.

Races like Cleveland and the mix of short oval, super speedway (a 2 mile oval or left turn course), road (permanent course with left and right turns) and temporary street course make CART unique and the best test of drivers skill in my opinion. It's also entertaining to watch a different type of race each week as drivers that excel on the oval courses don't necessarily do that well on street courses and vice versa. Unless your name is Cristiano da Matta, in which case you'll be in F1 next year lighting it up just like Juan Montoya is right now (except for race day, when Schumacher dominates, but then again Schumacher never raced in CART).

It's a shame to see that CART's rival IRL hasn't folded yet, as they are really destroying open wheel racing. IRL is a oval only league and that sucks in my opinion. I'd rather see drivers on the streets that I drive on (like Toronto) than ovals. Yes there is no real racing oval in Canada either so that does factor into my decsision. But at the end of the day, would you rather be down town watching a race 3 days in a row, or would you rather drive up north an hour for a 3 day weekend? Yes both have their pro's and con's, but unless I'm partying with Tha Preacher, I don't really want to be up north.

Lions training camp starts in 11 days. Hmm, what can I say about this years version of the Detroit Lions other than the youth movement is on and that means no playoffs this year :( Oh yeah, and the Buffalo Bill's ticketing system sucks. I had to wait in line for an hour and a half before I got through to their servers (why didn't I just call you might be asking? BECAUSE THE FUCKING LINE WAS BUSY!!!!). Well, I still got great seats, section 140, row 16 seats 1-4. 16 rows from the field, $50 USD to get in and two teams that compined for 5 wins total (yes the Cincinati Bengals actually had more wins than both the Bills and Lions put together). But hey, that's the NFL for you. Ahh well, I'm going to be spending the night before the game in Niagara Falls so what do I care?

That's about it for my sports rant for a few days. I don't think I'll have anything else to publish that's worth while.

Ouch, it's hot outside today, so hot in fact that I'm not going to do a real update. I'm probably going to go to the driving range this afternoon and whack a few golf balls, probably followed by extended states of inactivity. If anything of note happens, I'll post an inflated version of the story tommrow.

Well, my feelings of great laptimes are over now that it's been brought to my attention that Boost Monkey clocked a 33.02 lap. I really feel insignificant right about now. That's a 5.67 difference between by best lap and his! Well, I know somebody who's going to be spending a lot of time training hard, saying his prayers and eating his vitamins.

Just got back from formula kartways. Went there with the professor who claimed to have written the book on racing. Well, guess who came out with the best laptimes? I DID!!! If you haven't been to formula kartways, I say go. It's an indoor go kart track that you have to back off on the gas sometimes. With a concrete floor, you are constantly sliding around and always on the verge of spinnning out (and yes, I did spin out only once though).

Lap Times

Car #8 (the professor)

Lap Time
--------------------
15 39.72
05 39.97
09 40.30
10 40.94
08 41.60

Average Lap Time: 44.82

Car #13 (StuGautz)

Lap Time
--------------------
11 38.68
10 38.83
12 38.93
14 39.03
15 39.09

Average Lap Time: 41.31

As you can see, I was the faster driver today. But this was a first time out for both of us, so these numbers shouldn't really mean anything. Another thing was he held up a few laps to wait for me (I spun out one time, and the other time my car wasn't started so he had a half track lead on me). And if the professor ever tells you he knows how to pass, just look at him funny because he drives EXACTLY like Micheal Schumacher (minus the speed of course :p)

As for my one spin, it was actually at a pretty fast part of the course. I was right on the professor's tail and felt like I had the speed to pass, I just couldn't get the line. So I try to stay on his tail and take the outside line into a quick right so I'm set up perfectly for the inside line on the hairpin. Well, I get in close then realize I'm not going to make the turn. So I hit on the breaks and move the wheel to the right. That's all it takes on a concrete raceway to spin out. I learned my lesson and didn't spin out again on that track.

I had a few good chances to pass the professor before I finnaly got it done. Paitence was the key. He could feel that I was pushing him, because he blocking me off at every chance he had. We go into a hairpin and I see him take it wide. In a Schumacher esque move, he cuts off my line and spins half way around. I'm forced to stop (because I'm not the type to bump) and let him recover. Next corner another near spin but since I have no line to pass, I remain in second. We do another lap around the track and get to another hairpin. This time he takes it wide and I sneak in.

For the next few turns I constantly felt bumping from behind as the Professor had nowhere to pass. Then one turn the bumping stopped. I look behind and the professor is spun around. I laugh knowing that there aren't enough laps for him to catch up.

I'm going to go back real soon and improve on my lap times. Who knows, I might even crack 38 seconds (I know i have it in me).

Just want to tell everybody that Boost Monkey now has an official link to my site on the sidebar. That brings my total amount of links (TAT) to 3. Don't forget you can always have you link alongside the others on my website. Just email me @ stugautz@rogers.com

Well, it's Friday and no phone call yet (just like they said). I guess now is the time to wait and see what'll happen. If you haven't noticed yet, the archives are online and you can click on them on the left. Also, I have a link to EnSabac's webpage up right now. It's also on the left. If you want your link on my site to be seen by the 4 viewers I have (2 actually if you don't count family members and 1 if you don't coun't me that leaves...YOU) just e-mail it to me and I'll post up. My e-mail address is on the left. E-mail now and if you are one of the next 10 people you'll get a 1 love Stu t-shirt.

Here's the story about the interview. If you haven't read part one yet, scroll down and read about the events that led up to the interview.

I get to (name removed)'s office at 3:41, it's a small office, but it's got a window and a view of....nothing much other than part of the building, but a window is a window nevertheless. Anyways, we get in and wait for #2. #2 shows up after a minute and the interview begins.

He asks me what I thought of the hot blond that was walking by and I said I'd give her the best two minutes of her life. Well, she overheard what I said and seemed to like it (she blushed). I then fake an urge to go to the bathroom and manage to get the blond to lead me to the washroom. Well, for the next 5 mins, that blond moaned in ways she only dreamed of before.

Well, if you believe the above paragraph to have any truth involved, please go seek help because none of it happend. In fact I didn't even see any good looking blonds in the office :( I just thought that you guys might be more interested in that then what really happens.

After #2 asks me what my last job was like and I go on for a 5 minute speech about what I thought they wanted to hear about what I did on my last job (and for those that wanted to know, I managed to explain what I did without lying (seriously))!!! I didn't explain about the huge amounts of downtime I experienced, or the days of downloading movies off IRC. Anyways, I'm asked about web design and how much I know of it. Damn, they had to inquire about my one kryptonite. I never bothered to go much into web design because frankly there's no skill needed for it. I know what you guys are thinking "But Stu didn't you have to know HTML to design this webpage?"

And the answer is no, because Blogger provided me with a template. I just add in text and blogger does all the coding. Anyways, after defusing a sticky situation, I'm asked about my knowledge of Terminal services. Well here is one thing we didn't learn much about in school. So just sticking out any answer I possibly could to sound smart, I say "Oh yeah, I've had experiences with that, I installed SSH on a Red Hat 7.2 system so we could remotely administer the server."

Damm was that a perfect answer that I pulled out of my ass or what? Those guys seemed impressed with my knowledge (or implied knowledge). Later they mention that my resume was on top of about 50 others! Damn am I good or what? I thought it was just that the co-op office liked me, but they claimed that they went through all the resume's and mine was the one that ended up on top. YAY Stu!

Job duites: Basically what's going on right now is the company doesn't have a real full timer working in IT. They have the co-op plus two other guys that know a lot about IT, but have other tittles offically. So the co-op would essentially oversee a lot of the IT work from tech support to web maintence to server administration. That's a lot of stuff right there, but it sounds good.

The interview was going great. They told me the hours that I would work if I was hired. They ask if I have any questions. Not knowing any real questions to ask, I ask about wages. They respond with "How much did you make on your last job?"

Without flinching, I mention my last co-op wage 16.25 / hour. Their jaws dropped ot the floor. "Well, we may not be able to afford to pay you that much, but you'll get somewhere between $13-$14/hour with some overtime". Well that's good and bad I guess. The overtime means I'll have a chance to cash in on making money, but I won't be making as much as I used to. From that point on, the interview didn't go as smooth as it had previous...untill they asked if I had anything else to say.

I didn't, but I think a silent answer would have killed me so I say "I like the paint you guys have on your walls here." I know, if this were wrestling and I said a cities name that I was appearing in that night, I would have got a cheap pop. It's not much different what I said, but hey, they seemed to laugh (if only polietly). (Name Removed) escorts me out of the office and I leave knowing I did well in this interview. I'll get a call sometime next week and I'll find out whether or not I got the job. Let's keep our fingers crossed and hope for the best. They want to interview a few more people, but I think that's just because they might be interested in somebody less qualified than myself.

Well, just got back from a job interview (yes, this is a real job, not a technical sleeper like my current one). Did I ever tell you guys how my whole house was painted with paint mixed by the great people at Para? Did I ever point you guys to the professionaly done website at www.para.com? Well, now that I'm done sucking up to para paints here is how the interview went. But before I get to that, let me put some buildup to the story (because half the time what happens before the story is better than the actual story).

Around 4:30pm yesterday I get an e-mail from a person at para paints (names concealed because they didn't sign a release form....yet). He wants me to call him back to arrange an interview. Well immediatley I have three options:

1) Walk out of class and call him ASAP.
2) Wait until I get home, which will be after 5pm and leave him a message so it's one of the first he hears in the morning.
3) Call him tommrow morning either before or after he gets in the office.

Well, for those of you who know me, the answer is simple. I never do any choices that don't involve putting things off. So I went with choice number 3 and called him at 8:30am (conviently right when class started so if the phone call went nowhere I had an escape). Well, I call him and guess what VOICEMAIL. DOH. So I leave him a message and go to school. 9:00am and I get an MSN message from my mother (yes she is on MSN and no you can't have her e-mail address). Buddy from Para called me back and I was away. Class ends at 10:15 and I head home to call him back. 10:30 I call and guess what? Voicemail again. Will I ever talk to this guy?

10:40am he calls me up and after a breif conversation (where I quickly manage to say linux about 7 times) he wants me in for an interview TODAY. Well, 3:30pm is the time that is agreed on. That leaves my schedule today as 12pm-2pm nap, 2pm-3pm get ready for interview. 3pm-3:30pm go to Para. 3:30pm interview. Seems simple enough, except I forgot one thing, today is Thursday which means I have to visit hooters or else I'll go into withdrawl.

11:36am: Boost Monkey: Hooters?
11:37am: Stugautz: I got a job interview at 3:30, but I think I can sneek in a visit before the interview

I won't bore you guys with the rest of the conversation other than I was at hooters by 12:10pm. One thing to mention about Boost Monkey, he has the best Talon I've ever seen. His car fucking rocks!!!!

Boost Monkey actually works for a living (unlike a certain writer who will remain nameless). So we can't really take more than an hour for lunch. Well, it doesn't happen. Due to a waitress who didn't want to give us a bill (although she did give Boost Monkey a nozzle from one of the pop fountains, but she was good looking so it's not like we could complain). Well, we get out of there around 1:25pm.

1:35pm we stop off at crappy tire so Boost Monkey can get some 8mm digital tape to record his home made goat orgy's. Orgy's where goat's wear socks (hehe inside joke to those who were in reports and presenations Wednesday). Well, 1:45 and I'm back at Sheridan and it's time to pick up my car so I can go out and buy myself a shirt and tie.

2:00pm and I'm at the Bay. This was the first time in my life that I ever bought a tie. I've bought a dress shirt before (boo to LCBO for making me wear one) but never a shirt and tie combo. $100 later, I walk out a nice medium blue shirt and black and blue striped tie.

2:30pm, half an hour before I'm supposed to leave and an hour and a half into my nap (yeah I was supposed to take one today) and I feel a rumble in my stomach. Well so much for that shower I had planned. (I did take one in the morning, but I was sweating pretty good in this heat today).

2:40pm still on the throne.

2:45pm start wiping.

2:50pm flush and wash hands (yay for Canadian toliets that you only have to flush once. If this was Mexico I would still be flushing). 2:52pm...DOH my brand new shirt comes wrinkled. Can't they sell pre-ironed shirts. Realizing my mother isn't anywhere to be found I take on the task no man wants to do. I iron my brand new dress shirt. Keep in mind, if I screw this up, that's $50 down the toliet. So I plug in the iron and do my best.

2:55pm I hear the door open. w00t it's my mother and my ironing issues have been solved!. 2:55:15pm (that's 15 seconds for those keeping score at home). DOH It's my father a man who knows as much about ironing as Bin Laden does about shaving. Well, given that I still need to brush my teeth, I blindly put my faith in my father to iron that shirt. Suprisingly he does a good job. I got to give the man credit. First he beats cancer, now he iron's my shirt. Is there a better man on the face of this earth? I haven't met him.

3:05pm. I'm now running 5 minutes late and have traffic on Steeles between me and Para. Hop in the Corolla and head down. 3:27pm, turn left on Kensview Ave in search of building No. 11. 3:29pm, doh, I was supposed to turn right (I figured that out when I saw Finch and the entrance to Wild Water Kingdom. 3:33, I find Para paints, now let's go to reception and ask her to page...umm WTF was his name???

3:34pm, I call home and tell my mother to check my email for the guy's name.
3:35pm, I get the name and walk into recption to get (name removed) paged.
3:37pm, I see (name removed) go into the washroom (at this point I didn't know it was (name removed) who was going into the washroom).
3:40pm, (name removed) greets me and shows me to his office.

I'll post the results of the interview later, time for me to eat now.

Crikey! The Crocodile Hunter is everywhere

Anybody watch that B.C. - Toronto game last night? What a wild finish, one for the ages that's for sure. WTF is up with those Argos, didn't anybody teach them how to tackel? They had no business winning that game, but neither did B.C. with their turnovers, missed field goals and penalties.

Micheal Bishop reminds me a ton of Mike McMahon of the Detroit Lions. Young and athletic they are both able to use their speed to get them out of trouble. Also they both have horrible completion percentages and play for losing teams. One difference I did notice is when Bishop is under pressure, he seems to know where to run, while McMahon just gives you the imprssion he is running (despite being one of the fastest players on his team). Well, up next for the Argos is Edmonton on Saturday. I predict an Edmonton win, 35-14. I hope I'm wrong.

Also while talking about sports, anybody hear that the Sabres might be moving to Hamilton? Well, I for one would be a fan of this move if it were to happen. I live about 30 minutes from downtown Toronto. A trip to Hamilton would only be 15 minutes longer, but I would stand a much better chance of getting tickets. Plus it's an instant excuse for a rivalry with Leaf fans!

Well, in keeping with the latest trend to posting assignments online after they have been submitted, I am making my latest XML parser open source. Well here is the link. It's alright I guess (if a little bit late) and it does it's job. I started the assignment about 15 hours before it was due, work 6 hours straight and had a working model due in time. The model I had working was a "B" model (meaning I could get no higher than 75%) So I show up to class the next morning and to my suprise (really this time) we are allowed to work on our assignment. WooHoo 3 extra hours of work before I have to hand it in. I definetly can get an "A" assignment done in this time.

Well, you guys know what happend. I tried to get fancy with my program and in the end, found a way to break it. So instead of handing it in on time and getting full marks for a "B" assignment (75% remember) I have to take my program home and work on it during the weekend (alright Sunday night). Well, sure enough I get the "A" (no higher than 85 % minus the 10 % late penalty = 75%) assignment done and ready to hand in.

This time I'm smart enough to make a backup version of the "A" version. But with a few extra hours until it was due, why not make a run for the A+ version? Those who know me, know that there was no real chance of that happening. "A" version is good enough for Stewy. So I hand in the "A" version (No higher than 75% now with the late penalty) when if I made a backup version on Thursday night, I would have got the exact same mark.

Lesson is never try!

Told you I would have a second worthless update today, and here are some random thoughts I just felt like putting up for everybody to read:

1. I hate work.

2. Doesn't it suck when you are bored, have nothing to do, know you have work to do and yet can't focus for more than a minute to do that work? Well thats the situation I face with my SQL assignment that's due tommrow. I know I should start it now. I know it's due tommrow and I know that I'm not going to get it off somebody else. So why don't I do the work? Honestly it's because I don't want to do anything other than leave work.

3. I really want a digital camera, I have the money, but I'm too cheap to spend $400 on getting a descent one. (Getting anything below cutting edge is unacceptable in my world, it's nothing but ego).

4. I need a new cell phone, but I'm too lazy to go do something about it. Nokia and Samsung have new phones out with digital camera's built in (can anybody say two birds with one stone?) but alas they are only available in Europe (do people even live there?). I wouldn't mind getting myself one of those.

5. My java assignment was finnaly completed today. Horribly designed and not tottaly complete (it can't parse more than one tag on a line) I handed it in because it was late. If I had spent more time and effort on completeing it, I probably would have had one of the better marks in the class. But my viewpoint is, I know there is no chance of me graduating with honors, so why stress myself over a fruitless attempt? My brain was mush all last week as I could barely stay awake for more than an hour at a time. Ahh well, mark my words, for the next assignment I'm going to do a really good job on it (this time I swear I will). I'll even learn Java for mobile devices and get my program to run on Palm OS. That'll show everybody else in class who the real man is!

6. NHL will soon go the way of MLB unless they implement a salary cap.

7. Anybody out there watching CFL football? I don't know about you guys, but I kinda like watching it now. Maybe it's the anticipation building up for NFL in September, or maybe it's the fact that the only other alternative is baseball, but CFL looks pretty interesting. And go to an Argos game, all you can eat Pizza for $22. Best deal in town.

8. I've only killed 10 minutes of work with these random thoughts.

Bah, it's Monday and I'm back at work :( It sucks returning to work when you haven't been here for two weeks. I remember thinking to myself on the weekend, damm you know how much money I'm not making by being at home and not work. Well if I ever say that around any of you guys ever again remember to slap me silly because TECHNICAL SUPPORT SUCKS. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if people here spoke english, but they don't. So I have to translate whatever the fuck it is they are saying (and of course I can't mumble profanities under my breath because that's not allowed according to the boss). Ahh well, what to do, I know, I'll take a 4 hour bathroom break, come back in time for lunch, disappear for an hour, then take another 4 hour bathroom break (hehe, Mexican food, you don't buy it, you rent it).

Well, that's enough for now, as I feel a dinner break comming on as soon as I find some guys e-mail address. I'll be back for another update in a couple of hours because I'll surely have a few more opinions to vent out (and I hate having people look at my posts before they are made official. Until then...LATER!

Well, my prediction of Tracy or Andretti was horribly wrong as neither of them finished the race. As it turns out, Christiano da Matta won that race. Just a few thoughts on the race right now. First, with the absence of yellow flags, the race was much more enjoyable to watch. As soon as the second yellow flag came out, I lost total interest in the race as the pacing was absolutly killed. Second, da Matta is fast and he'll be racing in F1 next season or the one after that for sure. He's too quick to be in CART.

It's tough to watch that race when you've been there in person the last two years. There is a whole different feeling when you are getting bag loads of freebies (free beer from my good friends at Molson two years ago) and T-Shirts.

Lastly, is there a race that looks better on TV than Toronto? I still think that the view of the start finish line, with the National Trade Center on one side, the Princess Gates straight ahead (with the CN Tower overlooking everything) it's just one great visual.

Only thing that can be improved is the appearnce of the concrete walls around the track. It's not the best thing to look at when half the fences are rusted out. I mean how much does it cost an event like the Molson Indy for a few cans of paint?

But if you are a casual race fan looking for an experience and your choices are F1 Grand Prix of Montrea or Molson Indy Toronto I say go with the Indy. There is just so much more to do. Of course if you like racing, go to F1 in Montreal. Those cars are faster and you'll apprciate the mechanics much much more.

Well, it's indy day, and while the race has just started, I realized I forgot to make my expert predictions. Having been to the race a few times (four actually), I can offically call myself an expert. Well, I'm gonna call an Andretti or Tracy win today. I'll be back later with a full update and thoughts from the race (and to gloat if I get my predictions right :)

Molson indy weekend here in Toronto. Normally I go down to these things, but with Cancun last week and Montreal for the F1 race a few weeks before that, I just don't feel like spending anymore money. But have no fear, posting my daily thoughts will always be free!

I've heard feedback from readers to my site and they all tell me the same thing: THEY WANT MORE PICTURES. Well, since I do not own a digital camera...yet (hint hint hint again), I'll just post whatever I have lying around untill I run out. To start with, here is a picture of Schumacher when we were in Montreal
Nothing else much to write up about really, except it isn't as hot today as it was earlier in the week and I've finnaly recovered all my sleep that I lost when I was in Cancun. I also have a java assignment that needs to be done, so I should get around to finishing it. Ah well, later all!

Just a short update today, if you haven't already done so, scroll down and read the weekend in Cancun (when they are archived, I'll put a special link in sequential order (not reverse order like it is now) for the Cancun trip. It'll also be used as recruitment propoganda for my February venture down there (which I hope to bring a large group of people with....MMMMmmm massive group starts riots and gang bangs).

Well, about Sunday night, HairyGreek pointed out that at La Boom there we where getting into the club, grabbing a table and having a few drinks. Then this mexican guy, just sits down next to us and starts drinking. He doesn't talk at all with us, he's just hanging around like he's one of the group. IT's kinda funny, because he followed me around for a lot of the night. Come to think of it HE WAS STALKING ME :O

HairyGreek also pointed out that he DID in fact leave his name, hotel and room number with the Mexican girl and he did NOT have sex with either the passed out room mate or the Mexican gril. Frankly, my version of the story sounds much much better than his and everybody wants HairyGreek to get laid. So I'm sticking with what I posted earlier even though it may not be the total truth. But come on guys, if you only had vague memories of the night and you needed one of your friends to tell you what happend, wouldn't you rather have been in a threesome than have no sex at all? I mean really, isn't that the goal of every guy that hasn't yet had more than one girl in bed at a time? Well if I'm wrong than so be it.

I don't want to bore you with the details of the flight home either, other than my stomach wasn't settled when we were at the airport, and I felt like I was going to puke BEFORE I got into the plane. But, me being the trooper I am, managed to hold down whatever was in my stomach and kept it there for the whole ride home.

Here is a big thank you to Canada Customs and Immigration for the free Canadian flag magnets and pins they gave us. It's nice to see they knew that Monday was Canada day and actually did something good with their budget. I now have 2 Canadian flag magnets (if you know my car, they are actually stickers...I don't want anybody with magnetic hands touching those magnets) on the back of my Corolla alongside a Canadian flag sticking out the window. It's now a mini Canadamobile I drive. If I had a digital camera (hint hint hint) I'd take a snapshot of my car. But I don't, I just got a scanner (anybody wanna trade???)

I said I'd keep the post short today, and I will. I probably could rant on a few things that are on my mind right now (see Java assignment) but I won't. Good day everybody!

Mmmmm fresh strawberries. My mother just picked some today and we got a couple baskets full. These things are soooo good (espcially considering I didn't see any when I was in Mexico). It almost makes me feel like busting open the oven and baking some strawberry type cake. But alas I know you guys would rather read about my adventures in Cancun on Day 3 (some people call that day Sunday).

Anyways, we wake up that day around 6am (woo hoo to wake up calls). Sunday was World Cup Final day. And before you guys yell at me for my prediction, yes I did take Germany, but hey even the best of us are wrong. Anyways, game started at 6am not 7 like here because Cancun is an hour behind us. Normally I would write my thoughts about the game, but fact of the matter is, I was asleep 20 minutes into the game, and woke up to see the medal presentation. When I think of this, I'm reminded of a survey they did in England a few years ago when 90% of men said they would rather watch the World Cup rather than have sex with the women of their dreams. Well I missed the world cup, so does that mean I'll see Britney in my room very soon????? Or at least 70% of her?

Well anyways, after the game ended, I started to wake up (figures I sleep during and not after the game) so where better place to go than to get some breakfast. Seeing as the two other roomates are DOA right now, I go get myself some breakfast. MMMMmmm, a plate full of watermellon, cantaloupe, honeydue, and potatoes. Health food at least (and this time I'm not being sarcastic). Back to the hotel room and Talon is finnaly showing some signs of life (by signs I mean moving after recieving a shoe to the head) and he goes for some breakfast (time to watch some TV). I flip through the channels and land on the world cup. Hmm, the odds of Britney comming into my room have just fallen to 50%, but hey, wouldn't you guys like a 50% chance to be with her instead of the standard 0.0000000000000000001% chance that most of us presently enjoy (unless you are gay AND famous, in which case the odds jump up to 97%). Well, I watch a bit of the first half (hey no goals that half, odds just went back to 60%). I rest my eyes for a bit, no actual sleep, but I was borderline when the game was on. Anyways, no sooner did Talon come in than HairyGreek wakes up. And he goes for breakfast.

During this time Talon and I decide to hit the beach (neither of us want to wait for HairyGreek to get ready, because frankly nobody will ever know when that is. So we hit the beach for a bit. I go into the ocean for a good half hour (by myself) and then hit the beach to warm up. Another hour of lying down and it's time for lunch. Grab lunch (did I mention that the odds of Britney have fallen down to 10% now that I have seen both goals?) and HairyGreek mentions that he lost his shirt last night and wants to get it back. I know what you and I are both thinking, he ain't gettin that shirt back. But he's convinced that he has the room number and the hotel of the girl he stayed with last night, so he'll get that shirt. Personally I'm shocked that he has that much information but yet DOESN'T HAVE A SHIRT. Anyways, he calls the other hotel and they ask for the name of the person in the room. HairyGreek is stumped by that one. He's got no clue what the name is. I tell him her name was Maritzia (yes, the same one from that bang bus episode....he was out of it, he didn't know any better). Anyways, he wants to go to her hotel and retrieve his shirt. Of course Talon said "Yeah go ahead and get it, we'll wait for here". That was Talon's best idea by far, let us sleep while HairyGreek goes to look for his shirt.

With HairyGreek gone (he took the damm key with him) one of me or Talon will have to stay in the room until he comes back. Normally that isn't an issue, except one of us have to tell the tour guide that we want to go to a club tonight. Hmm, which one will it be? What better way to decide the Rock, Paper, Scissors??? The one who loses gets to talk to her (not a bad consulation prize if you look at her, but considering that you have to get up and off your ass, it's a lot of work). Anyways, back to the game, it was a one shot winner take all affair. Going in, I had to have a strategy. My strategy was simple, get him to think you are taking rock, and suprise him with a scissor. Well, I tried that strategy and sure enough, Talon had the EXACT same strategy as me. So, we go into round two. I stick with my original gameplan (scissors because there is no way he's gonna pick rock. Well, here we go. And what would you know? I WIN. Scissors cut paper!!!!! YAY ME! Well, Talon goes to make the arrangements, I get full use of the remote control AND don't have to leave my bed. So I turn on the TV and guess what's showing? Another replay of the world cup (odds of Britney back to 0.0000000000000000001%). Well, within 20 minutes I'm out colder than a drunken Irishman on a Saturday night.

HairyGreek is back and still doesn't have his shirt (you know, it probably would have been a good idea if he slipped his hotel name and number, along with his name and intention to get his shirt back under her door). Let's go to downtown Cancun and get some Kalhua to bring home. I heard a rumor that you can buy booze at the Wal Mart's in Cancun. We take the bus to downtown, and I try to confirm the rumor. For starters, that WalMart is huge. It's a combination grocery store/wal mart and the place was massive. Took us 10 minutes, but we found the booze section, I pick up my Kaluha and a bottle of Evian (thinking you can't go wrong with Evian, it always tastes normal). Final bill: 99 pesos. ~ 10 USD Which is roughly equivalnt to $15 Canadian. The same things purchased here would have easily ran me $25 so I'm up $10!!!!

Back to the hotel and it's dinner time. Dinner is good. They got some beef fillets and a grill out. Mmmm beef. We eat dinner grab a few drinks and kill some time before we go to the club (my version of time killing involved showering). 10 rolls around, we grab one last tequila shot and head down to La Boom. The club wasn't too busy that night, nothing like Coco Bongo, but it was ok I guess. They had me dancing on the bar twice during the night surrounded by a few girls. Not bad I guess. Somewhere in between HairyGreek decides it's time to go back to the hotel and not tell anybody. That's fine by my standards I guess. So we leave the club around 2am and hop back on the bus. We get to the hotel room and guess what? No greek to be found. Hmm could he have actually picked up two nights in a row? Well, I don't care, the room in spinning, and if I land on the bed, that means I'll be able to get some sleep. Well, I drop down, and luckily enough, hit the bed smack in the center. Close my eyes, it's 3am and there is a knock on the door. Turned out when the HairyGreek went for a walk, he turned the wrong way. It only takes him an hour to figure out he went the wrong way. So he has to walk an hour and a half to get back to the hotel room where he is greeted at the door by an angry Stu (you would be angry too if you had to wake up).

And so ends my Sunday night in Cancun. Not nearly as interesting as Saturday was, but a good day nonetheless.

Alright boys, Saturday in Cancun. The story you have all been waiting for. I have got tons of messages on ICQ from people dying to know what was going on. Well, guess what WAIT ANOTHER DAY. Hehehe, I would get killed if I don't tell the story today.

Let's begin where Friday left off. Wake up call comes in at 7:45am. On the bus we were told that we should go to the orientation meeting at 8:15am in the morning. Stupid Sunquest Tours representative thought it would be a good idea if she talked to our hotel first. So stumbling in on 4 hours sleep, we make it to the meeting area. I grab a seat and stare blankly for an hour at the tour guide while she talks about tours we could take. Yeah, on a 4 day weekend with soccer games on Saturday and Sunday mornings do you think we are really going to wake up early to take a tour? Well, sure enough, TalonBoy and HairyGreek thought we should take the Scuba Tour Sunday morning. I told them "Yeah sure, go ahead and book it", knowing fully well that both those guys are too incompotent to do anything themselelves.

9am, the orientation is over and we go to the beach. Ahh, nothing like the hot sun and is that a topless chick I see?????? It is, woohoo, first morning and Cancun and the topless chick count is at 1 already. I send HairyGreek in for a closer look, and it turns out that the woman is 45 years old!!! Urghh, I think I'm going to be sick. I think we could have done without that nudity incident. Well, time to lie down and take a nap. That nap lasts for 5 minutes before HairyGreek starts yapping at me. Ahh, good thing I had sunglasses on and he didn't realize my eyes were open. I just didn't respond to what he was saying and continuted my nap. Rule #1, when I'm trying to sleep, DO NOT TALK TO ME because you will not get a response.

So I take my nap for an hour or so. Wake up, it's 11am (I didn't have a watch, but I knew what time it was, because the bar is opening up) time for Tequilla!!!!! HariyGreek and I go in wanting a double shot and a soccer ball. Fair enough demand but this being cancun there was a problem. We get the first shot, no problem, then ask for the soccer ball. The bartender goes to search for a soccer ball, and tells a female around him to go get us our second drink. Well here is what happens: She doesn't get us a shot glass, but instead a disposable plastic cup. She starts filling, and filling, and filling. There must have been 3 shots in that glass. Me being the gracious guest I am, will drink the whole contents of the glass being offered to me. I put all 3 shots back, suck on that lime and get ready for some soccer on the beach. Soccer + Intense Cancun Heat + Tequilla - Fitness = A fun time. Of course, after twenty minutes I could barely breethe and needed a relaxing dip into the ocean. The water there was nice and warm (and before you think about it NO I DID NOT PEE IN THE WATER TO MAKE IT WARM). I must have been in that water for an hour because it was so nice in there. We get out, lie down for another 30 minutes and grab some lunch.

I would make a comment about the lunch, but seriously, I forget what we had. Only thing I remember was asking for a lemonade and being served a beer. DOH!!! We finish the lunch (It was grilled chicken now that I remember, and was quite good). and out comes my freshly squeezed lemonade. The carbonation of that lemonade made me wonder if it was alcoholic. I doubt it was, but I'll never know. After lunch, a visit to the hotel room for a quick nap was in order. Turn on the TV and what do we see? THE INCREDIBLE HULK en ESPANOL. Well not tottaly, it did have subtitles, but you get the idea. I remember seeing 1 hulk up and falling asleep shortly after that. ( you see, by taking naps every few hours or so, I could away with a few hours sleep at night, or at least I thought I could). Around three, we decide to go down to the heart of the hotel district to do some shopping. They got a nice mall down there and bunch of flea markets. We were only offered weed once, but since I don't look highly upon users of drugs, we were not interested.

I bought a sombrero and some ice cream. Total came to $25 USD. Bah, I overpayed come ot think of it, but I would have never heard the end of it from my brother if I didn't come back with a sombrero. Back to the hotel after being downtown, down another shot and some beer and eat dinner. Dinner was beef fajitas (I am positive on this because they were good). It's now 8pm and we got 2 hours to kill before we head down to the club. Back in the hotel room, I shit (this was the famous 6 flushing incident, but I'll save that rant for another day) shower and shave. Now with another half hour to kill before we meet up with our tour guide who will get us through the lines what better place to go than the bar. I grab a beer while we recap the days events. 9:45, grab a tequila shot while we wait longer. 10pm, and she's here.

Angelica was a nice lookin Mexican girl. And yes for those of you that were wondering, she looked good before alcohol, and incredible after. Although, speaking with a spanish accent isn't as sexy as a french or russian accent. Well, a quick bus ride back down to the club district. We get to Coco bongo and there is a massive lineup outside the club. At least 100 people waiting in line. Thank god for Angelica, she was an angel. No lineup for the Canadians as she had hookups inside and got us right through the line. $25 USD cover charge was a little steep, but it was all good because it's all you can drink. And that looks good on me when I try to buy rounds for everybody =)

Well inside the club and it's massive, three levels with an open center and a stage on the third level. I'm not going to even attempt to recount the proper sequence of events because there is no chance of me getting them right. Well here goes my best attempt. We go up the escalator to get in the club. The best comparison I can draw between this club and a place in Toronto would be the Famous Players Paramount. It's on the 4th floor of a building so the ride up is a few minutes. Get to the top level and there are Bacardi Girls (woohoo!) giving us Bicardi Gras neclaces. I had to get a little close to the girl to get my necklace. She had bad breath so no talking was needed. We get inside the club and we are together. Man this place is pretty crowded an it's only 10:30!!! We meet a waiter there name George. There is something weird about George but I can't put my finger on exactly what it is. I know, HE'S NOT EVEN MEXICAN. He's actually Philipino. $5 each and he'll get us drinks all night. Sounds like a good deal. I get my first beer and tequilla shot, then ordered another beer. I point out to George that easiest way to spot us is to look for TalonBoy (who is massively tall and probably the tallest guy in the club that night). Start moving around when I feel a tug on my arm. It's some Mexican girl who wanted to dance. Me being the perfect gentleman that I am, I accept. She wasn't anything special and probably a bit on the older side.

We get to dancing a bit and she gets another beer for me. WOOHOO, I didn't even have to flag down somebody to get a drink! So we are dancing and I decide that HairyGreek needs some fun (ok ok, I just wanted to take a piss and maybe get away from her). So hook HairyGreek up with the Mexican girl and take my piss. I get back and those two aren't where I left them. They are on another side of the club and HairyGreek doesn't have his shirt with him. Ahh well, it's all for the better I guess. TalonBoy is still there and seems to have found himself a Bacardi Bandana. High Five TalonBoy (inside joke). So we start moving around (hey where is George I want another drink) I move around a bit and look up on the stage. I see a Micheal Jackson impersonator up on stage with his Mexican dancers. Pretty funny. There were a few other stage shows like that. The best one had to be Vanilla Ice though. It was hillarious to see Vanilla Ice up on stage again.

I move around a bit more and find out that I am surrounded by 4 or 5 girls. (ok ok, I was just hanging around them having been split up from both TalonBoy and HairyGreek). One girl motions to another and flashes her (and me who just happend to be looking ;) The mexican witness makes a comment to the flasher point's at me. I never thought it was possible for a mexican to turn that red before tonight, but sure enough, I was suprised. So in my Tequila induced self confidence I say "Don't worry, I'm a Canadian". Yes that line made no sense at all, but I think she heard something different because she was laughing!!! I offer to buy her a drink (and yes that was an open bar so it cost me nothing!!!) to which she accepted. Within minutes of the handoff of the drink, I was gone to another part of the dancefloor never to see this girl and her flashing ways again.

I check my watch, and it's either 2:30 or 5:10. I can't remember, but I was getting sleepy. Time to get outta here. Quick scan of the club reveals no Talons or HairyGreeks to be found. I'll wait outside the door of the club for one of them to come. I get out of the club and start going down the escalators. I ask a group of guys if they have seen a 6'4" Croat.

"Croat?!?" One guy replies, "what the hell is that?!?!"

"A guy from Croatia" I say knowing that these guy have never seen one in their life.

"Nah man, we are from Detroit come to our hotel, we got some pussy ready for you".

I contemplate the offer. Party with guys from Detroit or wait for Talon??? Had I been any less loyal I probably would have gone with them, but being blindly loyal to those that I am with, I decide to wait for Talon. Next time, if a situation comes up like that, I'm partying some more.

4am and neither Talon nor HairyGreek are here. Too bad for them, I got the hotel key and I'm getting back to the hotel. Although, that hotel party sounds really good right now. Hop on the bus and five minutes later I'm at the hotel. I open the door and there talon is lying down on the bed. I felt like hiting him with a shoe, but he was spinning around while sleeping on his bed, making contact with a shoe next to impossible. Bah, I'll just lie down and fall asleep on that other bed...hey where is the HairyGreek?

Well, let's rewind the story a bit. HairyGreek and the Mexican chick (who as it turns out was no more mexican than I am Italian. For she was nothing more than an American from East LA. Good thing I made the handoff). Well, those two left the club around midnight and took a bus down to La Boom. Before I continue, all of what I am writing here is events as told to me by the HairyGreek (and my interpretation of those events). The club down there was good from what I hear (although not better than CocoBongo from what the greek told me). They dance for a bit and go to her hotel room. Her roomate is in the bed, but seems to have been passed out. I'll let your imaginations fill out the blanks, but from what I was able to reconstruct, there was a threesome with a greek, a mexican girl, and a passed out roommate.

6am I get a wakeup call, and start watching the World Cup. 20 minutes no score, but a knock on the door. It's HairyGreek and he doesn't have a shirt with him.

Well so there is my Saturday, if you read the whole recap in 1 sitting, let me buy you a beer, because you deserve it. Tommrow, you'll read such stories as "HairyGreek tries to get his shirt back", "Stu hits downtown Cancun" and "La Boom".

Ok, normally I don't do posts this quickly to each other, but David Hasselhoff is an exception. Here he is singing hooked on a feeling in what just might be the funniest music video ever created.

Well, here it is, the first of the highly anticipated mini series of my vacation to Cancun. Get comfortable, grab a glass of water and prepare for my journey from Toronto to Cancun and the first night we spent there (sorry, no nudity in this part of the story....although other parts do have some frontal nudity).

Let's begin with the me getting off the plane (trust me, nothing interesting happend on the plane ride or the 3 hour wait at the airport other than my reading of Animal Farm...yes I did buy a book to read even if it was only 94 pages). We get off the plane and right away I think to myself THIS COUNTRY IS FREAKING HOT. The same temperature we had on Monday was in Cancun on Friday night. I think we got off the plane around 8:30 or so....that part of the journey is too far back to remember specific details. Customs time. I show my passport, Miguel (fake name, because I don't know what his real name was) looks at my passport, stamps it (first stamp in 3 years on that passport) and sends me on my way.

Next in line behind me is TalonBoy (due to some legal issues I will not use real names although I did recieve verbal permission by the parties involved to use the events they were involved in). He shows his passport and get's through. Next is HairyGreek. Now there is something you must know about this person. Everything he does in life, he has to make difficult for the people that he is around. Too stuborn to get a passport like the rest of us, he maintained that a citizenship card and drivers license were enough to get him into Mexico.

One thing you must realize about this citizenship card of his was that IT WAS MADE IN 1985! So he's a little kid in the picture that obviously looks nothing like himself now. HairyGreek shows the citizenship card to Miguel who gives HairyGreek a really dirty look. Strike one. Miguel wants to talk to a supervisor about this ID card. He walks back and disappears for what must have been an hour (ok ok, it was only 2 minutes but common, I gotta make the story good right????)

Miguel comes back and says "You no allowed to come into Mexico, get on zee plane and go back to Canada". Too bad he was just being sarcastic because that would have been hillarious to see HairyGreek in a Mexican prison.

So we pick up our luggage and get onto the bus. We are greeted by a guy who sounds EXACTLY like Eddie Guererro in his Latino Heat days. I though those guys didn't really exist, but alas I was proven wrong. I couldn't stop laughing for the whole 30 minute bus ride to the hotel. We get to the hotel, check in, get our wristband (that's the blue avalon bay one in the huge ass picture) and go to our room. I immediately sense that THIS COUNTRY IS FREAKING HOT so I turn on the air conditioner to max power (a level it stayed at all weekend I'm proud to say even though the maid almost fainted when she found out how cold it was in the room). The room had a ceiling fan too and that was turned onto medium power (it was at max until Talon pointed out that the thing was about to fall off the ceiling).

Settled into the hotel, we go to the restaurant and eat a quick meal. Those pork chops were some of the best I had in a long time. Thumbs up for that. Although, the apparent lack of fruit did leave me puzzeled. It was a buffet at the restaurant by the way. Waiter comes by asking for drinks, to which I order a beer. Thankfully it was not a Corona but instead a XX beer (that's only two x's). That was the only brand of beer I saw in Mexico. We eat our dinner, I finish my beer and place my glass next to Talon's.

Talon is a 6'4" Croat. He's much taller than my 5'7" body. But for some reason I got the bigger glass. Ahh well, Mexico know's how to treat their VIP's. We order a round of Tequila shots to chase down our meals with and then head to the lobby to find out how to get to Senor Frogs (from what I hear one of the two best clubs in Cancun). A trip back to the room to get changed and a trip back to the bar for a double Tequila shot and it's off to the bus. The good thing about these buses is that there is one every other minute. And 6 pesos (which works out to $1 canadian) is a damm good price (and the bus driver actually gives change unlike the TTC which I have boycotted due to horrible service).

We get to Senor frogs, pay the $10 USD cover charge and are greeted with plastic glasses that are a yard long. They sell drinks by the yard at this place. What a great idea!!!! As for the club, nothing special happend there, it was alright, too many Americans in the crowd. Senor Frogs is the white wristband (it slowly turned grey by the end of the trip though). Highlight would have to be the waittress sticking a bottle in Talon's mouth and forcing a shot down his throat. She did the same with HairyGreek. Kinda funny how I was able to dance my way out of paying for a shot of who knows what the fuck was in that bottle. I think HairyGreek had 3 shots shoved down his mouth.

We leave the club around 1:30am (having not lost anybody). Spanish Bumble Bee Man asks us if we want to head into a taxi. HairyGreek says "no" it's only a 20 minute walk back to the hotel, we can make it. Yeah, maybe 20 greek minutes (which would explain why he was always late) but to you and me and the rest of the world, that was an hour long walk.

We get back to the hotel, I try to take a drink of water from that water jug we have....WORST WATER EVER TO COME FROM A BOTTLE. This water was just horrible, and it wasn't even chilled! I lie down on the bed and go to sleep. Thankfully nothing was spinning when I closed my eyes.

Tommrow, Tequilla, Soccer, Tequilla, Hotel District, Tequilla, and Coco Bongos.

Bah, having problems with my webserver...Rogers tech support is non-existent. Instead of doing something to fix my account, they told me to de-activate it and reactivate it. What kind of solution is that?

Damn, I almost forgot, HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And a big thumbs up to the airport for giving out free Canada flag magnets and pins at customs checkpoints. I never get tired of seeing the Maple Leaf (that's the red and white one, not the blue and white one that some hockey fans will have you believe) fly high. In fact, I have one flying off my Corolla right now, and I'll keep it up for the entire month of July.

While I'm updating my page, here is the scan of wristbands from my quick visit to Cancun.

I'M BACK BABY!!!!!!

Yes, after 3 nights of intense fun, we managed to get on the right plane and head back to home from Cancun. Where do I start talking about my trip??? It's amazying how much can get done in 3 days when you don't sleep. So I'm going to have a general update here, and a longer, more detailed 3-part mini series starting tommrow with updates each day.

Of course, there are a few random thoughts that I want to put down right now.

If you are going to Cancun bring as much of your own water as possible. The hotel we went to did supply bottled water inside the room, but it was room temperature (and even after having the air conditioner on high for 3 days straight, it was still warm) and tasted exactly like stuff that would have come from the tap (not that I remember drinking Mexican tap water). I bought a couple bottles of water myself and even broke the bank buying a bottle of Evian (I started asking everybody if they spoke french while drinking that bottle) and they didn't taste much better.

Come to think of it, almost everywhere I go, it's really hard to brush my teeth with the quality of water around. Honestly, for all the supposed problems Toronto has with it's water, I think drop for drop it's the best in the world. I can brush my teeth with no weird after taste at all (unlike Cancun, Montreal and just about every American city except for Detroit....Detroit has good water in my opinion).

While on the topic of water WILL THEY GET SOME FREAKING WATER PRESSURE IN THAT COUNTRY. 5 flushes without toliet paper is what it took me to get rid of the first meals. FIVE FREAKING FLUSHES. And then I still had to wipe my ass (and let me tell you, it was much more that five to get rid of the toliet paper...I essentially had to tear, wipe, flush repeat. It was one of the best feelings in the world when I got back, and just flushed one big stinking (I knew it was bad, but when your mother yells at you because she can't walk upstairs due to a rancid smell comming from the upper floor washroom -- and for those keeping score that was WITH the window open, and door closed (yes the smell was creeping out) while I was on the throne) pile of Mexican waste down and I did not see one nugget pop up. ALL HAIL CANADIAN TOLIETS for they are the best in the world.

Cancun was hot. Granted on July 1, Toronto was 3 degrees hotter than Cancun, but the haze and smog act as a filter of direct sunlight. Cancun doesn't have that same smog so when you are outside with that sun's heat beating down on you, sweat comes easily and by the bucketload.

Food in Cancun was alright. There wasn't much of a selection, authentic Mexican food was rare, fruit was non-existent after 11am and I DID NOT SEE ONE TACO AT THE HOTEL. On the plus side, the beef filets (essentially small, thin steaks) and chicken were good.

Clubs....you'll hear about those stories in the next 3 days.

Tequila....you'll hear about those stories in the next 3 days.

Beer....you'll hear about those stories in the next 3 days.

Alright, if you didn't notice, that has been a longer post than I anticipated so I was reusing material to speed things up. I'll finish things up now so I can scan my wristbands and post them for all to see.

So until next reading...later and remember, CANADIAN TOLIETS RULE and if you don't want an American to talk to you, reply with Parlez-vous français? It never fails to shut them up (although it backfired once on me...I'll write about that on Wednesday)